This goes hand in hand with being self-aware. Self-regulation means that you are able to monitor and manage your emotions effectively. Emotions can run high and low in workplaces and it’s completely natural, but being able to control them requires a skill. For example, as the leader, you would be the person to sustain safe and fair environments, because you don’t act on impulsive urges and can accept change and uncertainty. Also, a good way to master self-regulation is through reflection and thoughtfulness. This is especially important for workplaces and leadership because remaining professional and calm is a must.
Once you’ve become aware of the emotions you’re feeling, and can think about them as they are happening, you’ve opened the door to making choices, not just having reactions.
Emotions are inevitable, but reactions can be a choice. So how can you develop your Self Regulation? In essence, it’s about:
Intentionally decreasing or increasing the intensity of an emotion, and,
Deciding whether or not to act on an impulse or desire
Let’s break this down further.
When you notice an emotion rising up in you, pause and take a ‘reset breath’. This helps you control your attention, your thoughts, feelings and impulses. Finally, decide or not to act upon your immediate impulse or desires. This takes some practice and consistently noticing when your impulses are going wild can help you find ways to regulate in subsequent encounters. More on this in part 3!